You know, I'm vaguely wondering why I'm even bothering with this; but it's probably just because I have a feeling that writing stuff down that's happened is a good thing. Memory is as faulty as ever, and if I don't write it down, how else will I remember stuff - I'm far from amnesiac or anything, I'm just scatter-brained these days, and I blame my job. I mean, seriously, Google Calendar is a very close acquaintance to me now - birthdays, household chores, bills... if I don't have it on my calendar, I'm probably not going to remember to do it. I'll give it another few months before I have to put "Breathing - All Day Event - Repeats Daily" on there. >.<

So, yeah... my job:

Job

I'm still working in hell... err, I mean, "Redemtech". Yes, that's the right name for it. Of course. Some of my friends comment that it's like a bad play on shit from Office Space, and each day, more and more, I begin to think they're right. I'm now the head of what we call the "HDD Cage" - the place where good HDDs go to die... err... be data secured, and bad HDDs go to be crushed. It's certainly a trying experience. Thank god for that extra $0.50 an hour to make up for the additional bullshittery that I have to put up with.

We're currently working six days a week - Monday through Saturday - and usually at 9-10 hours on the weekdays, and another four to eight on Saturday. The paycheck is great, but everything else can go shove itself up it's own hole.

Post-Move Report

So, sometime around back in October, I decided that I wanted to move from the 3-bedroom, two-floor townhouse-apartment-thingy that Shawn and I were living in. Mostly because he had lost his job sometime in... September, and $1250 a month was really painful on my salary (at the time, we weren't working OT, but it's still roughly 60% of what I make, even with the OT). So, I got together with Lane and decided that we were going to find some place after mine and his leases were up in January.

Fast forward two months or so, and he questions if I'm alright with living with Ty again. Apparently, Ty had forgiven me for things that had happened in the past, and was willing to live with me again, because he needed the money, and if Lane was moving in with me, he had to come too. I grudgingly accepted - yes, I'm about as 'over him' as I think I'll ever get, but I still didn't exactly want to put us into a position where things could easily fall back to the way they were. However, I'm not the type of person who could just let another person - especially not one that I had once called my friend (how wrong I was on that part, more on that later) - end up screwed out of a place to live because he can't afford rent on his own. I mean, I had been paying for Shawn to live for four months now, I was certainly more than willing to deal with somebody who was still capable of supporting his end of the whole rent-food-electric arrangement.

Well, in January, we found what we thought was going to be a great house - four-bedroom, four bath (3.5, but who's counting), two-story and with one of the bedrooms and the bathrooms in a separate building over the garage (perfect for Ty and myself, because he'd have his privacy, and I'd have less of a chance of having to deal with him a lot - at the time, that's what I wanted). The best part: $1200 a month. Too bad we got screwed on it. Turns out, a week before we put down $2400 (deposit + first month), the house was foreclosed on, and the scumbag who rented it to us didn't mention anything. We still haven't gotten our money back.

So, scrambling to find another place to stay (thank god we still had our respective apartments for another three weeks), we thought we were going to have to go into something small and sub-par. I wasn't having anything of it - I've lived in places that weren't so great, and I really wanted a good house to stay in, someplace I could really call home. Lane was stressed out and really pushing us to find something. Ty was ambivalent as to the whole thing.

Finally, we found the perfect home. Out in Stead (only slight bad part, but the drive in to work is pretty much the same time anyway), this place has five bedrooms (four bedrooms plus an area that was an office, but is as big as the master bedroom suite and is a good bedroom for Lane), three bathrooms, and is seriously huge. 2800+ sq ft huge. It's bigger than my grandparent's house. We're only paying $1400 for it, and the older couple we're renting from are great people. Plus, unlike the one that we got screwed out of, or any of the others that we were looking at, it is big enough to hold all of our furniture comfortably, and still have room for us to expand.

In short, I'm incredibly happy with where I live - to be honest, I've often thought about later, if I find a better job in the area, asking if they would have any issue with allowing me to buy the house. At any rate, I don't intend to leave for years to come.

Ty

Ah, now we get to the tough part, no? I said earlier that I was wrong about him being a friend before, and I mean that. He was a friend to me, but I acted nothing like a friend to him, and it's taken me two years and a third meeting with him for me to realize that. I realize that I used to use him for my own selfish desires, and truly didn't act like I should have, and that's part of the reason why neither of us thought that reconciliation would be possible.

However, over the past two years, I've been able to move past the things that had happened, and actually grow up. Having to rein-in my wild emotions and get everything under control (which, again, I have to thank Shawn for this, because without his help I might have never realized how shitty of a person I was to those close to me) was the key to all of this. I'd make an excuse and blame things on my mother - she tends to not have very good control over her emotions either - but, in the end, it's my fault for not being strong enough to deal with my problems. Truly, that's what it takes: nobody else is going to have an answer for you, your problems are your own, and you'll be the one who has to deal with them in the end.

There's also the fact that I've had my fair share of not-so-great relations with roommates and friends that has caused me to better reassess what I had put him through - though I wouldn't understand the full implications of that until a few weeks after we had actually moved in together and we got to seriously talking and hanging out again, and we spoke seriously on what the problems we had gone through had been.

Ty, for his part, and, after a fashion, it pains me to say this, has experienced some of the things that I had with him. Mainly the issues with unrequited love. He has somebody whom he cares for, but who will never be anything more than a friend, just as he is to me. This, in combination with the time we've spent apart - and other things that have happened to him - has allowed him a better understanding of what I was going through. He even apologized for what he had done to me - needless, because I had already long since forgiven him for it, as I fully understand his reasons behind that - and I, in turn, have apologized for what I had done - also somewhat needless, as it was all in the past.

I won't lie and say that, in the end, I harbor no further longing for his companionship. Every now and then, I find myself wishing that I was the one he cared about. But, in the end, I have to say that I'm truly happy just being his friend - it's all that will ever come about, and finding contentment in it is something that had to be done. My hope is that it will continue for some time, and I'm being careful to just be myself, and not make the mistakes I made in the past.

Lane

I have to say that Lane is the person who I'm having more problem with now. I find that, in all honesty, he's an incredibly difficult person to live with - even more so than Shawn, at times. While I can't say for certain that I'm correct in how I read him - I'm quite bad at that, you know - he seems to have extremely anti-social behavior, and rather random mood swings almost constantly. All in all, it's a very trying experience, especially because he'll often hold it inside when myself or Ty does something that he doesn't like - right up until he explodes at us, often times me, and we have to try and repair things retroactively.

I have no issues with Lane as a person; most times he's perfectly fine, and can be fun and entertaining to be around. I have no issues with Lane as a friend, either. I simply am finding that I may not be able to be his roommate forever, without one or the other of us coming to blows over it. I've learned a great deal about controlling my emotions, especially in an argument - the calm one usually comes out the victor, after all - but sometimes the things that he explodes over push the limits of my control. Even Ty, who had dealt with these things for over a year, is still baffled at some of the things that Lane says and does.

Like I said, I have no issues with Lane, except when the things at home boil over to a point that he explodes - usually over something that I hadn't even considered was a problem. It has brought me to a much greater understanding of what I put both Ty and Shawn through, however, and that, in itself, was a great life-lesson to learn. But like a teacher who won't stop going over the same lecture on a weekly basis, I'm coming to find that no matter what I do, Lane will end up with a new and "exciting" issue to suddenly toss up.

Shawn

My feelings on Shawn are mixed. He doesn't seem to care to talk to me at the moment, and I fully understand that. I wasn't the greatest person to him, and while I feel bad about that, and part of me misses him and the things that only he understood, I can't say that I miss having him around constantly. Our personalities, I mentioned in a previous entry, are almost completely opposite, and, in the end, I don't think they're compatible enough for us to get along in closed-quarters. Perhaps, after more time goes by, I'll again try and start up lines of communication, but, don't hold me to that.

Everything Else

Like I said, overall, I'm really rather happy with where I am in life. I've got good friends, a job that pays me rather well for the economy, and a great place to live - most people couldn't ask for more, and I don't think that I do. Yeah, I've got some unfinished projects that I want to take care of - and when work isn't zombifying my brain, I do try and get them done - but, other than that, things are great. :)

I have not (yet) disappeared off the face of the Earth. I just haven't had anything really drastic happen... except for the fact that Shawn is moving in with me in a week... somehow I can't muster up the energy to blog about that, yet, though.

So, anyway... a really interesting link I came across, thanks to Dual: The Lemon Tree Parade



"The Lemon Tree Parade project is a SasuNaruSasu fanbook in English. It will comprise new and old pieces of work from very talented artists and authors in the fandom. It will be a non-published book with no profit. The book will be bound, not published, so no copyright laws will be violated. We do not claim to hold the copyright for Naruto."

And... after three months of no posting... that's all you get... :D

I... err... *nervous laugh* ... yeah. I didn't realize I hadn't posted in over a month and a half. Short entry for today; I'm falling asleep as I type this.

Not much has happened in the time I've been gone. Work continues on, and on, and on... I'm really antsy for a change in pace and a change in scenery. Trying very hard to work up the money to move in the near future, and as such, I need to start looking for a job in Dallas soon. My goal is to be out of here by the end of July, when my lease is up. So far, I'm not sure if I'll make it, but damn if I won't try my best.

At this point, I'm pretty sure I just got passed up for the second promotion opportunity I've tried to take at my work. The first I didn't think I'd get, but this one I should have had a good shot at.

I'm not really resentful if the person who I think got the job got it; he'll do a good job with it, and it keeps the other candidate that I really didn't want out of the position, and out of sight on our other shift.

Bleh. I hate work politics.

Oh, also: I've gone back to World of Warcraft for a while. Hooray for Horde paladins, because I couldn't stand playing Alliance again, I don't think. (not that Alliance are bad, but, overall, I've found that my groups horde-side have been much more successful than anything I had in my long history of raiding as a dwarf priest.)

I'm not really one of those people who puts a whole lot of stock into dreams. I don't sit there and say "oh, this must mean this" or anything. So, I'm really only posting this because, on some level, it irritates me.

I hardly ever dream. Or at least, I hardly ever remember when I dream. Even less so are the dreams that I actually remember what I dreamed. It happens maybe once a month, if that. So, when the one time I dream, and remember it is about Ty, it somewhat irks me. I've all but forgotten about him, it's not like his memory bothers me (thanks for that, btw, Shawn), because I've been "over him" or whatever you'd like to call it, for quite some time now.

It wasn't just one dream, either. It was like a series of three or so dreams. Smallish ones. Each took only a few minutes to play out in my head when I remembered them.

The first, it was dark, cold and had the feeling of snow, though it wasn't there. I recognized that I was sitting outside my grandparent's house, and most of the family was there. Meaning it was Christmas time (probably the only time that you have a remote chance of getting everybody together without killing each other). For some reason, in my dream, Ty drove up, and much to my confusion, did that thing where people touch closed fists together in a gesture of camaraderie or something. The dream ended at that point.

The next one, Ty was sick, but we went and saw some type of play (even though I know I don't care for plays, and I doubt he does either... o.0). We were leaning on each other in a too friendly sort of way. Not much else important in this one.

The last one, we were together playing WoW, sitting in the same room. I believe I was trying to set up some sort of ten man raid. He mentioned something about the past, which made me a little sad. When he noticed, he came over and kissed me, and that was the end of that dream.

Now... like I said, I don't put much stock in dreams, and certainly none of these events have ever happened between Ty and I, nor do they have a chance of ever happening; he's straight, and I don't think either of us ever intend to become friends again so that we don't go through the same issues again. Like I said, it just kinda irks me that I waste the one dream I remember every so often on something stupid like that.

Why does my brain like to bring up the past to try and mess with me being happy? heh.

... if you're a masochist.

I recently purchased a second Compaq Proliant DL360 server from my job. The DL360 is a fairly decent server for what I paid for it ($50). Sure, it's a P3, but for my needs, it's more than enough processing power to host my web server.

It's sibling, my first DL360, had Windows 2003 Server installed on it. And it runs extremely well; with Active Directory enabled, it only takes about a minute and a half to finish booting, which is damn good for AD. However, I'm very partial to Linux for web servers and such (Apache, PHP, MySQL, and SVN, along with SSH and SFTP), so for this one, I decided to install Linux.

Let me just say that, three days later, it feels like I've been sodomized with the server. Linux is very good, and the last machine that I installed it on went flawlessly. Support for the DL360, however, has been nothing short of a nightmare, stemming mostly from an issue in certain kernel versions relating to Compaq's "Smart Array" card.

Fedora 7: The first thing I tried was my trusty copy of Fedora 7, which is what I was running on a custom built computer (which was my previous web server, but, since it's the only server in my arsenal with SATA support, it's getting turned into a file server running Windows). This didn't work so well. You might get it to install, if you add "noprobe noapic noacpi" to the kernel options, but it's hit and miss.

Xubuntu 7.04: This one was recommended to me by one of my friends. It also failed decidedly more horribly than Fedora. At least with Fedora, I could typically get it installed all the way. With Xubuntu, it randomly decided that it thought that half the base install packages were corrupt. Again, you might be able to get it to run with "sym53c8xx.blacklist=yes sym53c8xx_2.blacklist=yes" tacked onto the kernel options. (for reference, the sym53 drivers are what conflicts with the cpqarray driver, and blacklisting them seems to work 99% of the time).

Ubuntu 7.10: Just stab me by now? This one had the same problems as the previous incarnation. It pretty much felt like it would randomly pick packages and go: "No, I don't like you, you're now corrupt." On three or four burns of the ISO. However, in the end I did get it to fully install. Once. With almost no packages installed. Considering Ubuntu's structure is somewhat different than Fedora's, I finally went to...

Fedora 8: Hallelujah. It sorta kinda worked maybe. Alright, I digress. The first time I tried it, it installed flawlessly (if you ignore the brain fart I had at first, when I got the x86_64 kernel instead of the i386 kernel - it was late, I had already wasted most of my weekend, shut up).

Then I started installing things, and decided to try out this tool called ISPConfig. Nifty little control panel that brings control of your web, mail, ftp, and dns services together under one easy to use interface. In the end, though, I decided that it wasn't what I wanted, and, since it had already changed a bunch of configuration files for all the different services, I decided that just reinstalling Fedora would be easiest. I mean... it went perfect the first time, what could possibly happen?

Well, it turns out that many things can happen. At this point, I'm waiting for the installer to just tell me to give up. You see, since the DL360 doesn't have a DVD drive, I have to install via a minimal boot CD - meaning it has to download pretty much every package it wants to install. And my internet will randomly drop out at the moment (hopefully getting that fixed tomorrow). Well... if the internet drops out when it's getting a package... it decides that it doesn't need to try again, proceeds, and later tells me that said package is either missing or corrupt, and that I should turn around, bend over, and take it, because the entire install is now, in a nutshell, screwed.

At this moment, I'm on my third attempt to get this working again. I have high hopes for this one. I'm using a different mirror. And various talismans to ward off evil.

As an aside: If anybody reading this happens to also be trying to install things on a Proliant server, and you need help, I'm more than willing to offer what limited experience I have with the beasts. Because, "it's not safe to go alone". >.<



Completely unrelated to my issues with the server is the fact that, for the past two weeks, I haven't gotten much of a chance to talk to Shawn. It's starting to really piss me off, because the only times I do get to talk to him, he's been something of an ass. I mean, I understand that he's got his own shit going on and all, but... *shrug* After a while, you get tired of being kicked under the porch, yo.

After talking with Shawn a bit last night, I realized that I hate myself. Oh, no, not like that. No big "OMG I'm the worst person in the world and should die" or anything. Just certain parts of me. Namely the fact that anytime he brings up talk of getting a girlfriend, I get at least three emotions going through my heart all at once.

First off... there's happiness. That's the good one, ya? I mean, I want him to be happy, and have somebody who he can care about and who cares about him. So, I'm happy that he's thinking of getting a girlfriend. Kinda...

Because we step right into sadness from there. Why? Oh... it's nothing really major. I just wish it was a boyfriend, and me. Like I said: nothing major. It's not like he's completely straight or anything. *cough* You don't believe me, do you? Fine... so he has no interest in men. That's not a problem though. I don't want him to have interest in men. I want him to have interest in me! Of course, I really don't have a reason to want him to want me beyond that I don't have anybody right now. And he's hot. And my best friend. I should really write that the other way around... like, stressing the friend part more than the hot part.

Don't get me wrong. It'll all really pass when I find a relationship to be in. He tends to be a good counterbalance to me; I'm calm, I plan things out, etc etc. On the other hand he's the poster child for ADHD a little hyper. This is what makes him my best friend, we work really well together, and typically don't murder each other have a good time at it.

Would we work so well in a relationship? Probably not even if I hid the knives. And the forks. And the cat. *blink* Wait... what cat...? I'd buy him life insurance with me as the beneficiary?

Oh... and the third emotion I have a problem with when he talks about women... exasperation. For many reasons. Mostly because when he sets his sight on a girl, he tends to get slightly... involved in the whole thing. Basically I get the impression that any communication will be impossible without him mentioning her name every three minutes a few times. Plus there's the fact that he always comes up with new and interesting ways in which he's improved his personality since the last time he tried to attract the attention of females. I mean, it seems like he's heading in a good direction, but... what ever happened to just... y'know... being yourself and not having to change for people to like you? I like him as he is now! In bed. As a friend.

I think my job has made me lose my mind...

So, I got back from my nice eleven (ten and a half, if you want to get technical or something) vacation to see my best friend. As such... there's way too much to write about...

In an attempt to get this organized in some way, I think I'll sort it into "Good, Bad, and Other"... or something...

The Good:

• Shawn: This part fits under all three categories, but, as far as the good things go - getting to see him and hang out was a lot of fun, most of the time. Spending time like this reminds me why I consider him to be my best friend. Things are nothing if not... interesting when you're around him. lol. He just has a way of making you laugh and like him, in almost every situation.


• Mass Effect: I took my 360 with me on this trip; after both of us getting bored with Assassin's Creed (ugh. Good concept, bad repetitive execution), we rented Mass Effect. Best game ever. Probably. The Mako is effing annoying to drive, but everything else is so utterly awesome. It was also nice having both of us playing the game; he went female Paragon, I went with a male Renegade... sorta... well... more like a Renagon (the bastardized child of a Paragon and a Renegade, most commonly referred to as a normal asshole). Anyway, by doing this, we both got to see how the other path worked out.


• Not being at work: This one is kinda a given. For 16 days, I haven't had to be at my job, and I've gotten paid for it. How is this not a good thing?


• Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei: A random anime Shawn found. Take one pessimistic suicidal teacher and pair him together with the most optimistic naive student, and make it funnier with randomness. You get something close to this anime.


• Halo 3: Shawn dislikes Halo. Well, more pointedly, he dislikes FPS, fighting games, and any other game that he doesn't have a good chance of winning. Shawn is a pussy. One of the friends Shawn brought over, one of his female coworkers, however, loves Halo, and challenged me to a few matches. After finally realizing that there was no way that we were going to get connected to XBox Live (I hadn't migrated my Live profile back to my console after the last time I played at Tommy's house, and upon trying to recover it, Live informed us that the signup service was down, for like an hour) we just played custom maps. Or rather, we played a map at 300% speed, 50% gravity with nothing but grav hammers and spartan lasers. I lost. But only barely. After realizing that she was much better at timing the hammer, so lasering was a better idea. Shawn, on the other hand, got his ass kicked.

The bad:

• Shawn: There are a few things about Shawn that drive me nuts. This is also why he's my best friend, because despite all this, I'm still friends with him. That may make sense, but I make no guarantees as to my sanity. The main issues I have are that he tends to be irresponsible, impulsive, and typically somebody that needs somebody else around to keep him in line for his own good. I had to remind him that paying rent wasn't just a "good idea" but a necessity. Also... he has no idea how to cook, or clean. I ended up doing both. And I don't mean three course meals here. I mean... like... putting ground beef on the frying pan (that I had to buy because he didn't have one) and mixing it with beans and cheese in a tortilla. Simplest meal ever next to like... ramen or rice. Also... on the subject of impulsive, he decided, the day he picked me up from the airport, that jumping up onto the railing of the up escalator was a good idea. Gravity, and everybody else, decided that it was a stupid idea, and he managed to fall flat on his face, thus getting a giant gash in his chin and severely cutting up his knee. We ended up going to the hospital immediately from the airport because of it... leading me to bad thing #2. Also, since I just realized that this entry is longer than the 'good', please understand that this is mostly because of explanation or backstory - I do still love him, in a platonic way.


• Hospitals: The American medical issue is... moronic. To get Shawn a total of 10 stitches and a tetanus shot, I spent four hours in the waiting room of the ER. For two hours, I listened to another patient writhing in pain in his wheelchair, just waiting for them to even get him in to see a doctor. I mean... seriously. Doctors should be salaried employees... get more to the hospital if your patients are experiencing wait times greater than... like... 15 minutes. Grow a fucking brain medical professionals.


• Airports: Admittedly, it's not the airport's fault. But both of my flights experienced delays. The first was negligible, one of my flights was like twenty five minutes late getting out. That's fine. My flight back, however... pisses me off to no end. First off, about ten minutes before they began boarding, they explained they needed eighteen open seats on this flight, and anybody willing to leave on a later flight (three hours later) would get a three hundred dollar travel voucher. I almost offered myself up for this. It's 8:50 AM. Commit it to memory, this is important in understanding my anger at my airline. So, finally, about ten minutes late, we board. Twenty minutes later, we're still sitting in the plane, with our androgynous steward explaining that we have a maintenance issue and he will keep us informed of updates every ten minutes. Three minutes later (I know because the song I started playing right after he explained the first time isn't even done), he repeats the same information. Get a watch dude. Six minutes later, he comes on again, and explains that we're going to deplane and switch to one in the gate next to ours. Sure. Fine. We get off the plane and stand outside our other gate. Fifteen minutes later, we see people being deplaned from the one we're supposed to get on. So, to get this straight: they moved us from our plane... to one that was already boarded and about to take off and are moving those people to somewhere else... if you're following their logic, I think you're psychotic. At this point, our flight and theirs stand at this gate for god knows how long before they finally decide what plane they're moving the other people to. After this, it's a short... thirty minutes or so... before we're finally able to re-board our new flight. To recap again: our plane sucked, so we got to shove some other people onto a different flight, making both groups late, and meanwhile American is having a nice circle jerk with gate changes. It's 11:10 AM before we get on the runway. Remember what time I was supposed to leave? Yeah. For those of you who are doing the math, it's only an hour before the other flight that I could have gotten paid to take would have left. I consider hanging myself with an oxygen mask or something.


• My External HDD: So, the last thing that went bad on this trip was one of my external 500GB hard drives. It worked fine up until I got it home, plugged it in, and the drive started whirring and beeping at me in a fashion that indicates that it decided to take a long trip off the short plank of existence. Will Seagate replace the drive because it's (hopefully) still under warranty? Probably. Does this still mean that I lost a large amount of stuff? Yes, yes it does. Oh well, shit happens. I should have backed up the anime and whatnot to DVD before I left.

Nearly done here...
The other stuff:

• Shawn: Shawn is an exceptionally open minded person. He describes it as his personality being malleable and subject to being changeable. Whatever. Either way, the end result is that I tend to let my guard down around him, and pretty much only him. Probably why he's able to make me laugh like nobody else and why he can piss me off a lot at the same time. Like I said: best friend. He's also fairly good looking. And likes to wear shorts. Most of the time: nothing but shorts. Which is a problem when my guard is down, y'know. lol. So, that's a problem, but not really.


• Shawn's friends: Being that I didn't know any of his friends before this trip started, and that I have problems around new people, I kinda went into a minor state of shock being around so many people I didn't know. Which was, admittedly, only about three new people, the most pressing one being one of Shawn's closer friends. It was an interesting experience, but, of course, annoying at the same time, because after a few hours, I was ready to tell him to go away because of feeling uncomfortable due to having to be around somebody new for that long. He seems like an interesting person though.


• Texas: I was told that Texas was going to be a culture shock to me, being that I grew up mostly in California. Maybe it's because we didn't spend nearly as much time outside as it would have taken for that to sink in, but, it didn't really seem all that bad. Except for, of course, the fact that the roads are like somebody was doing massive amounts of hallucinogenics when they designed them. Nobody who is thinking coherently thinks that you need that many one way streets and strange onramps and offramps that involve diving on and off the freeway in very short amounts of time. I probably would have felt more comfortable if I had my car.

Anyway, that's my story. I'd stick to it, but... god knows my brain will probably forget half of it by the time a week has passed. Either way, I had more fun than I've had in a very long time. Well... probably only about three months, that being the last time I saw Shawn, when he came to visit me back in September. You'd think, with the amount that I wrote in the "bad" sections, that I wouldn't think that way, but, the good still far outweighed the bad. At least to me. And that's what counts, no?

I'm sure if I put more thought into it, I'd be able to expand on the list of good things, but, of course, I'm also lazy. heh.

Ah well, back to work tomorrow. Maybe I'll be able to get through a day without plotting the demise of one or more of my managers. :D

(Crossposted to the usual places)

This is me bitching. Yup. Pretty much.

Generally, these days, I hate showing what I'd refer to as weakness. It's annoying, and typically tends to only serve to piss me off later. Heh.

Either way, I know that this morning I was cheerful and all together smiling when I left my apartment, and by the time I got home, after spending all of about three hours with my family (parents and younger sister), I was annoyed and mildly depressed.

I mean... seriously. It's freaking Christmas. When I got there (at 9:30, I might add, so it's not like it was early), my parents were both playing WoW and my sister was still in bed.

What eleven year old stays around in bed on Christmas morning?

So... after spending overly long convincing them to actually start anything remotely festive-like (and my mom getting pissy because that's what she does anymore... get stressed and pissy), I managed to cajole them into... y'know... opening gifts; my sister being the nominated gift-passer-out-person.

I think robots on depressants move more excitedly and quicker than she did.

*bashes forehead into keyboard* I don't think any time spent with my family has been 'normal' in the past... who knows how many years.

Ah well. It's only one day, ya? And I know it could be worse.

Either way, the day turned around when I got home. Read a bit of Dualism's work on FFnet (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1066716/Dualism) and her LJ, and it brightened my day right up. By far the funniest author I've read that I can remember, and that goes for both fanfiction and published authors. It's so good.

Tomorrow: waking up and flying to Texas for a few days (read: about 10) to be with my best friend and his friends. Should be an interesting experience. :D

(Cross-posted to my MySpace http://www.myspace.com/legendblade)

Edit: I'll fix my theme later. The one thing I really don't want to do right now is get started on designing another site. For now: Autumn in Kyoto.